


Say Your Fault (Or: Five Times They Did It and One Time They Didn't)

by abriata



Category: American Idol RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-25
Updated: 2010-02-25
Packaged: 2017-10-15 19:40:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/164292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abriata/pseuds/abriata
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fingering, toys, it's all good.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Say Your Fault (Or: Five Times They Did It and One Time They Didn't)

**Author's Note:**

> These were four kinkmeme prompts put into one long, connected story. It's just porn, guys, it's just porn. And kind of kinky porn, at that. And it ends really sappy. So, you know, you're warned.

"Hey, there," Adam leans against the doorframe. "What are you up to?"

Kris sets his guitar aside. "Just messing around."

"Sounds like an idea. Let's go," Adam jerks his head towards their bedroom, smiling winningly.

Laughing, Kris stands up. "Hi, Adam, it's nice to see you again. How was your trip?"

"Whatever," Adam says, and Kris lets him pull him down the hall. He's always like this, whether it's two days or two weeks, and Kris – it's not like he's not on board with it, but jeez. He gets pushed through their door and Adam's shoving his overshirt off his shoulders, and he says, "Naked, now please."

Kris says, "Okay, okay. Just get your own clothes!"

"I want to– " Adam stops, kisses him fast and chaste. "Come on."

"What's got you so wound up?" Kris tries to ask, but he gets kissed again after maybe the third word and kind of gives up.

Adam's down to his pants and undershirt but when Kris tugs at it he shakes his head, pushes him away. "Just you, right now," and he actually looks at Kris for his approval this time so Kris says, "Okay," because why discourage good habits? It's not like he doesn't know Adam's kinks. He's got this thing for powerplay, a little, and he never pushes too hard but mostly Kris indulges him, because he doesn't mind but it's never really done much for him.

"I want– " Adam cuts off again and Kris asks, "What?"

"There was this porn, you know?" Kris raises his eyebrows and nods, because he has no idea but he really doubts that's the point. Adam _loves_ porn, like, disproportionately; Kris thinks it's cute. Adam slides his hands over his shoulders, warm and determined and Kris realizes he's actually worried about this.

"Adam," Kris grabs his hands, goes up to kiss him long and slow until he tangles his hand in Kris' hair to kiss him back, "What about the porn?"

"It doesn't matter. It just – I want to finger you." And yep, there it is, he loses patience for tact and he always just blurts it out.

Kris shrugs. "Cool."

Adam smiles at him, hugely pleased and completely unembarrassed. "Can you get on the bed, on your stomach?"

He does, settles his head on his arms but asks, "You're just gonna do it? Cause I really gotta say, you're normally a little wilder than that."

"Shut it, Allen," Adam says, and then he's sliding his hands down Kris' back on either side of his spine. Kris hands him the lube, because hey, might as well get going, and Adam presses a kiss to the back of his neck. "I also wanna come on you," he murmurs, and _okay_ , that's a little more what Kris had expected.

He just swallows, opens his mouth to tease, maybe, and then Adam slides a couple of fingers into him, easy as you please because he always uses _way_ more lube than Kris needs, and Kris loses it on a moan. Another one of Adam's things is how he likes watching Kris stretch for it, and he usually isn't all for prep, because he says he likes the way Kris squirms and pants when Adam pushes him to take almost too much, too fast.

Kris is almost used to it, now, as much as he can be, and he breathes through it and forces out, "Fuck, _Adam_ ," because shit, a little warning?

Adam laughs, warm breath on his shoulder blade, and then he lifts away and Kris knows he's sitting back on his heels so he can watch his fingers working him over, working him open. He presses his thumb just along the rim, testing the skin and then dragging his fingers inside in a motion towards them, so Kris jerks and says, " _Adam_ ," because he _hates_ when he does that.

"See," Adam starts, voice soft and soothing, "the thing about this porno was that it was one of those ones with the reluctant star, you know? The innocent, virginal thing going on."

"Yeah?" Kris asks, shifting a little, because Adam's barely moving and it's almost awkward, lying here still with him just holding him open.

"Yeah," Adam says, and then he moves his fingers like before, curling his fingers inside as he thumbs just the edge, so Kris almost opens for it like another finger but doesn't quite get there, he hates the suspense, Adam knows he does. "And it was a girl, you know, so it was really just ambience," and only Adam thinks sex noises are acceptable substitutes for elevator music, "until they got to this one scene, Kris, I've got to show you."

He stops again, pulls his fingers out and puts more lube on them, Christ, Kris is gonna be _dripping_. "This girl, she was small and brunette, reminded me of you," and Kris grunts, because yeah, thanks. But, "Not like that, she was just cute," but Adam's voice is fond and he pushes his fingers back in, slow, so Kris is almost twitching and just waiting for him to do it already, but he pauses, pulls back to just the tips brushing over his hole, waiting, and Kris finally pushes himself up onto his elbows a little and pushes back impatiently.

Adam makes a soft noise, like approval, and says, "Yeah, baby," and then slides them in and bends them, there right inside so Kris feels like he's going to spread him apart. He doesn't, just flicks back and forth there a little, until Kris says, "You still haven't told me about the actual porn, you know," fighting to keep his voice steady because he needs a distraction right now, anything.

"Well, there was this one thing they did. It was about halfway through, and they were switching to anal, gotta spice things up a bit, you know," he's gently mocking, and presses his fingers all the way in suddenly, and Kris arches up and moans like Adam's done more than just give him the two fingers he'd started with, fuck. Adam rubs the small of his back, gentle circles like he's soothing him or something, freak, and Kris hates him right now. "And they were getting this girl open. And Kris, I think she might've been an actually virgin, you know, as close as they ever get with those things, because the way she _moved_."

He twists his fingers like he always does before he adds a third and Kris moans encouragement because yes, finally, but he pulls out all the way, _again_ , and there's more lube, squeezed at the small of his back to puddle and Adam slides his fingers through it, Kris doesn't know why, he knows they're totally soaked already, and, "Adam, come on, do you think I need the whole freaking bottle?"

Adam just slides his fingers through the lube and pushes more inside Kris' body, and it's almost slimy, now, to the point where Kris wants to reach back and slide his own fingers in, because it's normally like, okay, something's in me, this is good, great, but out of the ordinary, but now he's on edge, like he's so wet and open but not stretched like he's already been fucked, just like he really needs it, and he's about to go insane, seriously. "Adam," he says, "If you don't– "

But he does, pushes fingers in again, still just two, and Kris is seriously about to scream. He's so hard, leaking against their duvet, and he's had almost _nothing_ to get him there. Adam says, "She moved, Kris, like she had no clue what to do with her body so she just let them finger her open like she needed, just like she was waiting for them to get on with it, like a chore or something. It was gorgeous, really, because she looked like she wanted to get fucked so bad she wanted to skip everything before it, so it was hot, but I guess it wasn't on script, because this guy," Adam breathes out a little heavily and Kris would kick him for it if he wasn't focused on trying not to discourage Adam from doing _something_ , since he's just got his fingers pressed in Kris up to the knuckle and _not moving_.

Instead he pushes up onto his elbows and looks over his shoulder impatiently, which is so not better, because now he can see Adam, how he's watching his own fingers in Kris' ass. "Adam," he starts, a hint of a whine already, but Adam hushes him and twists his wrist a little, so Kris sprawls back down and waits. "I really liked the girl, you know, not just the guy, and it took me forever to realize why everything about it was so familiar, and you know why? Because it's how you are, every time I touch you like this," he barely moves his fingers and Kris practically sobs for it, "You try to rush through it and get going."

"This guy," Adam continues, "He didn't want her to just get through it. He rolled her over, ass in the air," he slides his hand across Kris' back again, still sticky with lube, and oh, _oh_ , Kris gets what this is about now. "And then he just."

Adam stopped again but Kris takes a deep slow breath and says, "And then he just fucked her with his fingers, right?"

"Yeah," Adam says, voice warm, but he slides out and Kris finally snaps, "I am not a fucking actress in a porn film, Adam, if you don't fucking do something you aren't going to be coming on or anywhere near me," but Adam just laughs, the fucker, and then he slides three fingers in and yeah, maybe Kris will forgive him because he's actually _moving_ now, fingers still so, so wet but full enough that Kris can push back against him. He works him over, fingers curl and press and then he pulls them out and moves up to kiss Kris.

Kris says, "Adam, don't– " because Adam's filthy in bed and he has no worries about doing something like sliding his lube-covered fingers into Kris' _hair_ , gross, but Kris sighs and lets him suck on his tongue anyway.

Adam says, "They never even got around to fucking her, he just got her so open, so stretched, just like twenty minutes of this," he presses his fingers back in and Kris kisses him, hard, _thank you, please_ , and Adam moves back to watch his hand again. "And then he came on her, _in her_ , just because she was so open."

"Jesus, Adam, I'm not a porn star," Kris thinks he has to remind him, but Adam's not listening anymore.

"By the time he was done she was just so far gone, like she didn't care about anything but what he was doing. I want." He doesn't finish, but Kris knows what he wants and he puts his head down and groans.

He doesn't really have a chance to try to convince him this _really_ isn't necessary, but Adam presses only two fingers in again and slides his other hand over Kris' ass, so Kris is just trying not to squirm. He does anyway, and Adam moves his fingers in and out, too much lube for friction and too gentle for pressure until Kris, practically begging, says, "Come on, Adam, just do it, I'm already letting you finger me, come _on_ ," and Adam hushes him again.

Kris tells him, "I'm letting you, come on, please," because Adam never says no when he begs, but it doesn't work, because he gets a third finger and Adam traces his thumb around the edge again, maddening, and Kris whines and shifts a little, side to side and then back onto his fingers. "Just, come on, please," and the worst part is he doesn't know what he wants.

"You're letting me finger you, Kris, that's what you said," and Kris thinks there's something deeper going on here but he's too desperate to be able to figure it out, strung out and so hard against the bed. He tightens on Adam's fingers, chokes out, "I want you to, please, I want you to," Adam pauses, his easy movements sidetracked, and Kris thinks he's found it, "Please, I want, please."

"What do you want?" And Adam's voice is low, rough, almost there, where Kris is and he won't hold Kris to anything he's so desperate, so Kris asks, "Fuck me?" because shit, Adam's curling his fingers again and he's so close to coming.

"No," Adam is smiling, Kris looks, but it's tense with impatience and need. He's still in his clothes, and Kris knows the pants are too tight, painful, because Adam always, _always_ bitches about it, but he's putting up with it now. "No fucking this time."

"Jesus, Adam, what do you want?" His voice breaks a little, and he takes a deep breath and holds it until he's a little lightheaded, trying to slow his heart rate.

"I want to finger you until you come," Adam leans down, presses his mouth to Kris' skin and bites a little, just a gentle hello.

"Fuck, Adam, I can't," Kris says, but then Adam pulls his fingers out and Kris groans, " _Adam_."

Then he's back, no extra lube but a fourth finger, and Kris feels him press them in, more than he's taken before but it's easy, he's so wet and desperate and he has to fight against squeezing down around them, because they're there and he just _needs_.

Adam says, "Oh my god, Kris," when all four are up to the knuckle, and Kris shudders then, a long roll of tension extending from the top of his spine to his feet, and he makes a word somewhere along the lines of, "Mrph," and buries his face in the sheets, because he's so hot, can't believe Adam's doing this to him, that he's letting Adam do this to him, and then they're deeper, sliding in past the knuckle all the way until Adam's thumb is just pressed on the outside, just fold it in and a little more and Adam would be fisting him, Jesus _fuck_ , and Kris squeezes his eyes shut and _keens_.

There's a kiss to his spine, again, but Kris doesn't respond, and then Adam says, "Can you come for me, you think, like this?" and Kris knows, they both know, he can, he will, just –

And Adam does, twists his wrist and he moves, Kris can feel his knuckles and his skin, all the lube and still almost too much friction, and it's enough, his body locks up, muscles shaking loose and he comes silently, face buried in his arms and Adam's hand spreading him almost all the way apart.

He sucks in a breath on a gasp when Adam slides his fingers out, because it's not a sudden movement but it's still almost too much, and he turns his head and tries to get his eyes to focus as Adam kneels up, fumbling with his pants, so fast and desperate and then they're just unzipped and he's jerking himself, a couple of pulls and he's coming all over Kris, just like he wanted, come messy on his back with the lube. Kris twitches, face burning, when Adam slides his fingers through all of it and presses them back inside one last time – fucking _filthy_ – and Adam settles over him, half next to but mostly on top, so self-satisfied he's going to be humming for weeks.

"I hate you," Kris tells him, heartfelt, because he has to get clean so bad, he's sticky from head to toes, his hair and his back, and he's so fucking wet inside he knows he'll stand up and it'll go out and down his thighs, slow and dirty and Adam'll _love_ it.

"You need a shower," Adam tells him gleefully, and drags him to his feet.

\---

2.

"No way in hell," Kris tells him, and shuts the bathroom door.

Adam only brings it up once. He mentions a lot of things, in passing or as jokes, that he wants to do to or with Kris, and most of them get ignored if they don't end up doing it right then. If Adam brings it up more than once it's usually teasing, because he liked Kris' reaction the first time, like when he'd mentioned watersports and Kris had nearly fled the room, he'd brought it up almost every time either of them bathed for the next month. Once they do something Adam usually moves on, and Kris is fine with that. Recently, though, Kris has been prepping himself, because no way in hell does he trust Adam to get his fingers in his ass again. Adam thinks it's funny, plus Kris thinks he really doesn't object to watching him do it.

But yeah, the problem is that Adam only brings it up once. And that's a problem because if it had come up again Kris would have known he was joking, would have been able to laugh it off. Then it didn't come up, and Kris just sort of. Well, he obsessed. And now he has no clue how to go up to Adam and say, "That thing you mentioned, with the vibrator? That might not be something I'm completely opposed to."

Except apparently that actually works, because Adam says, "Yeah, okay, baby," and kisses him slow and deep and falls asleep in his lap in front of the TV. Kris sort of just shrugs it off.

Almost two weeks later, though, Adam tells him, "So, that vibrator came," over breakfast, and Kris almost swallows his fork.

"Um," he says, "What vibrator?" Not that he's forgotten, but he thought vibrator in general terms, not, like, one specific, that's-good-for-me toy like Adam proceeds to talk about.

"And the best part?" Adam continues, totally ignoring his struggle to eat in peace, "It's purple, but not that nasty jelly purple like they've been doing, but the old purple, _really_ purple." Kris says, "Okay," like he cares what color the thing is.

And he really doesn't, but Adam seems to have exercised caution for once and when he holds it in his hand, showing Kris, it's a lot less frightening to consider. For one, it's actually a little smaller than Adam is, and Kris takes him all the time, and for another, it pretty much just looks black, not some horrible neon shade. Adam asks, "Alright?" and Kris nods, because yeah, okay.

Except then Adam wants him naked on his back and he does, he's great and all, but Adam looks at him, like Kris hasn't seen for a couple of weeks, and he's nervous. Adam leaves his clothes on, like the last time he'd decided to totally wreck Kris, and Kris decides not to say anything, because if Adam is going to be weirdly difficult and controlling again he'll pick and choose his battles, and pants on or off is not one of them.

"Spread," Adam says cheerfully, slapping one of his knees with their bottle of lube, and Kris does, but then he's putting lube on the toy and just going for it, whoa, and Kris says, "Um, you think," and sort of reaches down but the end is tapered enough that he just kind of _takes_ it, and he tries really hard not to swallow his tongue while he stares up at the ceiling, not, not looking at Adam.

"Hey," and Kris does look, then, because Adam's using his gentle voice like he does when he thinks Kris is freaking out, and Kris isn't, he _isn't_ , not right now, so he looks.

Adam smiles at him all ridiculously sweet and playful, easy for him when he's not naked and half-filled with a toy he wasn't stretched for at all with his body telling him, _hold on_ , and his boyfriend fucking always _pushing_ him, telling him, _let's go_. Kris breathes out slow and meets Adam's eyes and nods, but Adam shakes his head a little and traces his finger where the toy's going into Kris, holding it still, and Kris starts to think he really could be in trouble. "You're okay with this?" Adam asks, and Kris says, "Yeah, of course," without thinking about it, because he doesn't have to, he _knows_ he doesn't have to.

It's sliding all the way in, slow and cold, Kris clenches around it to try to feel, it's weird, all smooth and unresponsive, and Adam's just watching him, his face, not even the toy where he's taking it, which is completely not usual at all, and then he says, "You haven't played with a vibrator before," and Kris would say _duh_ if he thought it was needed, because obviously Adam knows that. Except it's not question, and Adam continues, "I think you should either grab hold of the headboard or let me tie you to it." And Kris doesn't see what that has to do with getting fucked at all.

"Don't you think we could stick to one fetish at a time?" He asks, plaintive, and Adam laughs.

"You do a really good job of acting like you don't completely love all of it, and besides, it's a kink, not a fetish," Adam tells him, like Kris should know the difference, and Kris goes red, because seriously, it's never _his_ idea, but Adam also says, "I'm just suggesting it for you," all innocent, like he actually believes that.

"Uh-huh," Kris says, skeptical, but Adam shakes his head earnestly.

"Really. You're probably gonna flail all over the place and it'll be easier if you're tied down."

"Um," Kris says, and to be fair he does think about it for all of like, two seconds, but if he is going to be moving like Adam says (and yeah, sucks to admit but Kris can't really think of a time Adam's been wrong about him) then he doesn't want to be trussed to the bed while he does it, thanks. He says as much and Adam says, "Your loss," flippantly, like he never really cared, and hits the lowest button on the remote.

Kris doesn't _jump_ , exactly, but it's just very obviously _there_ , in a way it wasn't when it was just a smooth piece of plastic. It's still nothing like getting fucked, but Adam presses on it, angles it, and shit, he's already squirming a little. Adam laughs, probably at his expression, but Kris sorts of hiccups in a breath and says, "Adam– " half a warning, and Adam turns the speed up.

Kris thinks it has five settings, he thinks, maybe seven, but just the second one has his toes curling and his cock jumping against his stomach, and Adam presses a hand to his hip to hold him down. "Sure you don't want to be tied up?"

"Fuck you," Kris tells him sweetly, because this is a matter of pride, now, and Adam laughs.

"Yeah, definitely. I want to make you come with this," and okay, now he's scratching his nails along Kris' stomach, hard enough to raise lines, and it's a complete contrast to the quivering pressure inside and good enough that Kris is arching up into it. It's not pain, not even close, but Kris thinks he is starting to get it now, how Adam's told him pain could be good. He doesn't want it, or anything, but he understands maybe why someone would.

He pushes his heels into the bed, squeezes tight, which, oh, bad idea, so much worse, it's not just a toy buzzing inside him if he's that tight around it, then it's his whole lower body, dick and all. He thrusts up as he does it, makes himself moan, and yeah, sex toys, he gets the appeal. He can't help wondering what it'd be like to have one bigger, filling him up enough it would be like he was clenching the entire time, and he thinks he can't ever tell Adam because he'd do it, he'd get one bigger, and another probably almost too big and make Kris take them both. Adam leans to bite at his ear, then moves to his neck and his collar bone, and Kris feels his teeth and he presses up into it, like he normally doesn't, even though that's not a line for him as long as Adam doesn't bite too hard. It makes Adam pull back, look at him, and he pants up at him, confused and turned on and Adam says, low and warning, "Last chance, are you sure?" and Kris squeezes his eyes shut and grabs Adam's shoulder, digging his nails in as hard as he can.

Adam rewards him by pulling it _out_ , and Kris says, "Adam," not pleading, not already, and Adam says mildly, "I really would grab that headboard if I were you," and Kris deliberately drops his hands to his sides. Rolling his eyes, Adam pushes it up to the third setting, and it's outside him, Kris can hear it buzzing, electronic motor working away and it's visibly moving in Adam's hand. He holds it up, showing Kris deliberately, and then he pushes it against him. He doesn't push it _in_ , which Kris could handle. He pushes it flat against him, so the tip is barely brushing his balls and it's not a tickle, it's an irritation, too much stimulation on too small an area, but it's all the way lower, too, and he sort of writhes and maybe actually kicks a little, fuck Adam's _always_ right.

"Told you," Adam says, not helpful, and grabs his leg with the hand that isn't pressing the toy too tight against Kris. He holds it against his hip, which is both irritating and comforting, because what, like he doesn't think Kris might be strong enough to kick and hurt _him_? but also like he thinks just holding Kris is enough to calm him down.

"Do not – " Kris breaks off, squirms away, he's about to do anything just to get Adam to stop. "Adam," because seriously, anything, and Adam repeats, "Told you," all wicked and pleased, and then he pushes it all the way in to Kris with almost not enough lube so the slide's torture, he feels every inch Adam pushes in.

He just kind of drops his head down and pants up at the ceiling, watches the fan circling lazily, he will not move any more, and then Adam turns it up _again_ , he won't let Kris have any time at all, and Kris absolutely does not sob but he definitely whines a little. He curls his foot, hooks his leg as close to Adam as he can get, and Adam pets along his calf but starts the vibrator out in a long slow drag.

Panting, "Adam, lube," Kris manages, and Adam shakes his head quickly, watching where the toy's pulling at his body.

"That ruins the feel, baby," Kris is told, and he wishes he remembered for sure whether it was five or seven because he's about wrung out and he knows Adam, knows he'll go till Kris is passed out or they've used everything the toy can do. It says something about him, he's sure, that he wants to be able to hold on until Adam's done with what he wants to do, has had _Kris_ do everything he wants him to do, and that he's not squirming and begging to come and end it all already.

"Deep breath, okay?" and Adam's back to gentle, Kris can't believe he's that _obvious_ , but Adam's also not going to stop so he's pretty sure they both know he can take it. Still, he breathes deep, and Kris thinks he can guess another of Adam's kinks because he's watching Kris' throat as he holds the air.

Adam clicks the speed up, shit, Kris hopes it's five, and he chokes on the breath, holds it in and counts to ten, to fifteen, because his whole fucking _spine_ is gone, all he feels is the stupid fucking toy working away inside and Adam's fingers still tracing around the edges. He angles it again, and for the first time it's right against Kris' prostate. Kris cries out, letting out his breath in a sob, and his hands scrabble for purchase until he finds Adam's arms, squeezes tight and maybe it's the wrong direction but he pushes back towards the vibrator, pushes it deeper.

"Kris, Kris," Adam leans forward, talks into his throat, and then he bites, hard, and Kris knows he'll have to yell at him later but he just whines with it now and _shakes_. "Kris, come on, come on, come now, baby, just – " and Kris comes, arching up and still with the fucking toy inside, Adam won't take it out or turn it off, it almost fucking hurts, but he comes forever and he can't get manage to tell him to stop.

He's totally limp, after, and Adam doesn't make him, just turns it off, and leaves it in. Kris is thankful, tightens down around it because he doesn't think he could be empty right now. He's shivery below his waist, Adam rubs at his ankle and he almost flinches from it, and Adam says, "Hey, relax," and presses at his thigh and calf and god, his muscles are wound so tight he thinks they might have broken.

"So, five," he mumbles, half-incoherent, and Adam looks at him for a moment, puzzled, before smiling.

"Nope," he shakes his head, and holds up the remote, "Nine," and Kris can't _imagine_ , is going to say _no, no, I can't_ , when Adam reaches down, but he just slides the toy out, slow and gentle, and Kris breathes unsteadily while Adam rubs his stomach. "Most people don't usually go above three or four," Adam tells him, like he's just making conversation, and Kris freezes for a moment and then says, "You complete, utter – "

And Adam really is, but Kris doesn't know what, because apparently Adam's decided Kris is recovered, Kris is fine, let's go, because he's got his pants down and he's, _fuck_ , he's sliding in, and Kris is so over-sensitized he groans and twists and just chews at his lip desperately while Adam moves in him slow, no extra lube than what was almost not enough because he's a complete bitch like that.

Kris doesn't think he can take it, not if Adam wants to actually fuck him, hold him down and open and play with him like he always does, but Adam just slides slow and easy and bends forward to suck at his own teeth marks (shit, Kris knows the mark's gonna be visible for days) and comes in a quiet slow slide.

"We'll have to work up to ten," Adam says, petting a hand down his side, and Kris' whole body arches at the thought, like a left over orgasm or a sudden reconnect of nerves, and he presses up against Adam and whimpers helplessly, and Adam kisses his face, everywhere he can reach, and says, "So good, Kris, good boy."

\---

3.

Kris drops a brown box into Adam's lap. "This came for you today."

"You didn't open it?" Adam asks, and Kris rolls his eyes. The last time he'd tried to open something labeled for Adam he'd freaked out.

"No, I didn't. _Normal_ people don't open mail that isn't theirs, remember?"

"Normal people just don't open shit that isn't theirs when it's _Christmas_ ," Adam says pointedly, and they've been through this like twelve times so Kris asks, "What's in there?"

"Stuff," Adam says, and shuts the lid on his computer. Kris opens his mouth to pester him, because come on, _stuff_? But Adam continues, "Come on, I'll show you."

Kris follows him to the kitchen, glancing at the clock. "Will it take long? We have to go soon." They don't, really, but Adam will take forever to get ready and he'll run out of time if he doesn't start soon. At least he's not doing full make up or anything outrageous tonight; Kris had succumbed to wearing matching outfits, what is his life, and he'd made Adam promise they would be fairly normal. It's bad enough he's going to the stupid Oscars wearing a turquoise suit.

"Yeah," Adam looks at the clock, "Shit, no. Yes, just – "

"How about we'll look after you get ready, if we have time." And Adam gives him this look like he's just ruined his day, and Kris says, "We can hurry, okay?"

And they do, but hurrying means Kris sits around for twenty minutes just waiting for Adam to put on the exact same outfit, oh my god, how is it possible to take twice as long to get dressed? So he picks up the box and shakes it, hears something thunking around and grabs a knife, because Adam clearly just said only around Christmas, but he's just slid the blade under the tape when Adam yelps, "Not without me!" and comes out to steal the box and bring it into the bathroom with him.

Kris huffs and sits, flopping down with as loud a noise as he can make, but Adam yells around the door, "Sit up straight, do you know how bad this material will wrinkle?"

So Kris sits up straight and waits, feeling ridiculously close to a mannequin or something. Adam says, "Okay," and stands in front of him. Kris rolls his eyes and stands up, follows him to the kitchen counter because Adam will try not to sit down _at all_ while he's wearing the suit. "So," he says peremptorily, and pulls the flaps up on the box. It's anticlimactic, since whatever it is, the box is face down and Kris can't read the tiny print on the back. Adam holds it up.

"That's a butt plug," Kris says, and Adam says, "Yep," all smiling.

"Why do you have a butt plug?" Kris asks.

"Um," Adam says, and Kris says, "You know what I'm asking."

"I want you to wear it tonight," Adam is tearing open the packaging, dropping it back into the delivery box.

"You do?" Kris raises his eyebrows, because does Adam know him at all?

"Yeah," Adam has it open. It's not the big, to be fair. It's a weird shape, sort of a blob that bends and comes to a dull tip, and it's just black, which, Adam has some pink toys, Kris is more than okay with black. Kris just sort of looks at it for a minute longer and there's the house phone ringing, so their car is ready. "Well?"

"I don't think – do you really expect me to go to a public awards ceremony with a butt plug in?"

"Yes," Adam says, and rolls his eyes at Kris' expression. "It's not that big of a deal. I've done it."

"When?" Kris asks immediately, and Adam smiles.

"I'll tell you after you have it in."

"Why do you even think I'll agree?" Kris warns him.

Adam widens his eyes. "You promised you'd make yesterday up to me." But wow, is  he ever bad at begging.

Kris doesn't think going out in public with a toy up his ass is a fair exchange for forgetting to bring Adam coffee when he came home, and he says so. Adam just looks at him and Kris warns him, "This is a really bad idea."

Shrugging, Adam leans over to rummage in the drawer for lube, like Kris is a done deal. "I wasn't sure you'd agree to it tonight, but I figured I'd just get you to do it during in one of your shows."

Kris makes a noise when Adam squeezes lube onto the toy and starts spreading it down the sides, and Adam laughs. "Yeah, I thought so."

"Bad idea," Kris repeats, but he pulls down his pants and leans his elbows on the counter. They _really_ have to go, and he figures he can get to the bathroom as soon as they reach the hotel and just take it out.

It's small enough that it goes pretty easy, just slick and cold and mildly uncomfortable. Kris winces a little at the idea of it but he does up his pants and tells Adam, "You're a pain."

Adam's watching him, none too subtly, while they walk out to the car, and Kris thinks they have a really long driveway. He's just – _aware_ of the toy, and how he walks, in a way he never has been, but it's not that bad. He thinks he can get through the evening; he probably won't even get hard.

Then they get to the car and Kris tries to slide in, and it presses just enough. He loses his breath in a rush and sits a bit too hard, and something how he moved made it shift, because it's pressing right into his prostate and he leans his head back against the seat. There's no way he'll get through tonight.

The door shuts, Adam sliding in next to him, and he says hello and gives the driver the okay before he slides up the privacy screen. Kris refuses to look over at him, because if Adam's smirking at him right now or something, Kris thinks he might just refuse to go. Or at least he'll go inside, take the stupid thing out, and change into clothes Adam's guaranteed to hate, just so they're even.

But Adam's hand slides across the back of his neck, warm and soothing, and Kris sighs and opens his eyes. Adam's not smirking, he's smiling, this warm, disgustingly sappy look. "You realize that after this you're not allowed to bring up wearing it in while I'm performing ever, right?" Kris asks, just making sure, and Adam says, "You never know. You might like it," all low and promising, and Kris moves to kiss him.

The thing presses even harder and he freezes, half bent closer, and his hips jerk a little, because _shit_. Adam slides his palm up to cradle his head, moves over for him to lick into Kris' mouth, slow and distracting, until Kris moves again inadvertently and jerks away to whimper.

"Come here," Adam reaches for him, and Kris shakes his head, because he's already figured out that the less movement the better. "You need to get used to it enough that you don't make noises or," Kris can't stop himself from clenching down on it and he shakes, a slight jerk in his thighs, and Adam gestures, "Well, yeah. You can't do that at the ceremony. People will notice." But by the way he's smiling, Kris is pretty sure Adam wouldn't mind people wondering at it.

Kris would, though, and Adam's right, so he goes and straddles Adam's lap. "This is a really bad idea," he says absently when Adam presses one of his knees up against Kris' ass, shifting the plug.

"Yeah, you've mentioned," Adam snorts, and Kris gives a half-hearted swat at his shoulder.

"You said you'd tell me," he prompts, then shuts his mouth fast when Adam grabs his hip and pulls him down more firmly.

"Okay," he hums, and says, "It was that first one you came to. The first one to see me, not to see me perform – "

"The first one I came to as your boyfriend," Kris says for him, because Adam's a little funny sometimes, and they weren't technically official yet but they were dating, so it's close enough.

"Here, move – yeah, like that." Adam lifts him up again to undo his pants, and then he rolls down the privacy screen a little, Kris will kill him, he doesn't _care_ that the driver knows what they do back here, he cares that he'll see it, but Adam asks, "How long?" and the driver tells them they have almost fifteen minutes, traffic's not bad at all, and Kris sighs, starts to move away, but Adam grabs his leg, keeps him still.

"We don't have time, Adam," not that he would mind, because he's not completely hard yet but oh, could he get there.

"We're not going to get _off_ ," Adam says disdainfully, "What would that do to our clothes?" faintly horrified, and Kris doesn't know why he's with him sometimes, really. But Adam still pulls Kris' underwear down to his thighs and reaches around, grabs the base of the plug and moves it. He wiggles it side to side, and Kris winces but manages to stay still, and then he pulls it out, until the tip is resting outside Kris' body. He slides it back in, out again, like he's fucking him with it, and Kris lets him because it's no worse than having it resting still inside him, pressing in all the wrong places.

Finally they arrive, and Adam peels Kris off of him, so he can brush wrinkles out of his suit and let Kris do his own back up. Adam helps, to be fair, but Kris is still leaning too heavily on him when they climb out of the car. It probably looks fairly normal, at least Kris hopes it does, and he focuses on staying in step with Adam and smiling the whole way inside the building.

Their seats are near the back, because they aren't involved with the proceedings in any way and Kris is really sort of thankful. Adam keeps a hand on his thigh as everyone files in, finding seats and doing short interviews outside and around the edge of the room. The lights are lowered and raised a couple of times, a bell dings, and the Oscars begin.

Honestly, Kris hasn't seen half the movies that are winning, so he wouldn't be that interested in the best of times. As it is, he keeps shifting, hoping something would make it better, but it doesn't, and Adam finally leans over and hisses, "Keep _still_ ," because he actually likes awards ceremonies, all the false speeches and pretty clothes, and besides, the old couple next to Kris keep glaring at him.

He makes it through three trophies and as they take a small break for the fourth he stands, moves past Adam until he grabs his wrist. "Where are you going?"

"To the bathroom." Kris snaps, and Adam stands up, slides his hands along his shoulders and down his arms.

"What's wrong?"

Kris leans up, hisses in his ear, "I'm taking it out," and sidles off to the bathroom. It's always a little hard, maneuvering through crowds like this, but Adam's trailing half a step behind him and he catches him in the hallways that leads to the restroom. "What?"

He knows he's being unfair, a little. He did agree, and it's his own fault he can't just ignore it, but he's about to jump out of his skin and he really doesn't like that Adam can just ignore him for almost an hour with all of it.

"Wait until the next announcement begins," he says softly, and Kris says, "Alright, okay," because he's probably right. They just lean against the wall as the people thin around them, Adam occasionally brushing a kiss against Kris' cheek when Kris squirms a little.

Finally they start up again and the hallway's empty, so they head toward the bathroom, Adam pressing a hand lightly against Kris' back like he needs help getting there. It's one of those fancy restrooms, the laughable ones that have like, a sitting room before they lead to the urinals, and then the stalls are in yet another room, so the whole thing is half the size of a house. It's all empty, at least, Kris makes Adam go check, and then he leans against the wall in the entry room and fumbles his pants off.

Adam comes in and watches him quietly, until he reaches behind himself, and then he says, "Leave it in for the rest of the night. Please."

Kris stops, looks at him. "I _can't_ , Adam," and Adam says, "I'll do anything you want, when we get home, but leave it in."

"Adam," Kris says, but Adam is looking at him like he does when he's desperate for something, and Kris has never been good at saying no. But, "I can't, Adam," he repeats, softer.

"Okay," Adam says simply, and drops to his knees. Kris jerks back, because they're in a public bathroom, even if it's a nice one, Jesus, but he hits the wall and anyway Adam's already pulling him out of his underwear and he sort of flops bonelessly against the wall. The plug's still in him all the way and he groans too demandingly when Adam licks at the head. He's way past embarrassment, just grabs Adam's hair in his hands and pushes, as much as Adam will let him get away with. It's his fault anyway, his idea, and Kris only feels a little bad when Adam chokes a little and pulls off. "Jesus, Kris."

He moans pitifully, tugging at Adam's hair, and Adam says, "You better make it quick."

"You don't have to sing anytime soon," Kris gasps out helpfully, and Adam pinches his thigh in retaliation.

It is quick. Adam takes him down his throat once, twice, slides his mouth off and swirls his tongue around the head, and Kris pants, "Oh, um – Adam," and comes. Most of it makes it in his mouth, but some stripes over his cheek and chin. Kris says, "Sorry," and really doesn't mean it.

"Sorry," Adam huffs, "Come down here."

No problem there, he just flops all happy and boneless down, except oh, fuck, the fucking plug's still in and that's _way_ too sensitive right now, so he decides he's not going to move anymore for a couple of minutes.

"No, you don't," Adam tells him, and leans forward to kiss Kris. His mouth is sticky and Kris takes the hint, licks his face clean. Or, cleaner, but Kris makes a face. "Oh, gross."

"That's rude," Adam laughs, but Kris says, "Make up," because no matter how good it looks, foundation and glitter and come do not a good combination make. Adam noses at his neck. "Are you good?"

"Yeah," Kris sighs, "but you still owe me."

"Hm," Adam says, and, "Yeah, you love it."

Kris shakes his head but they both know it's not an answer, and when they stand up to go back out Kris tugs at the plug briefly, thinks of Adam wearing it, because he's pretty sure that one concert wasn't the only time he did.

4.

"Have you seen that thing?" Kris calls, and Adam says, "Yeah, sure."

"Well?" Kris asks, leaning over Adam's shoulder on the couch. Adam's on gossip rag sites and Kris loses interest, pokes his shoulder. "Where is it?"

"Where's what?" Adam asks, then looks over at Kris when he makes a noise. "Seriously, what thing?"

"The vibrator, the purple one," Kris manages to keep a straight face, doesn't turn too red, and Adam stares at him silently for a minute.

"You want?" And Kris kisses him before he can finish, because if he doesn't actually ask Kris won't ever have to say it out loud.

"Where is it?" Kris asks again, because he's looked in their drawer and under the bed and he can't find it anywhere.

"You looked for it before, didn't you?" Adam says, and smiles slowly. "Were you going to play without me, when you first looked for it?"

Kris steps back, flushing, because he hadn't, honestly, hadn't even thought of it, but he sure is now. "No," he says, "No, Adam," when Adam laughs and doesn't believe him.

"Here," Adam says, and walks into their closet.

Kris wouldn't have checked a shoebox, so it's a great hiding place, but. "Why do you have things that you won't let me see?" Because he won't. Kris leans closer and Adam nudges him away, hunching over the box like he's guarding it.

"These are still secret," Adam tells him, and Kris doesn't tease because he means it. He wonders, though, and stares at Adam instead of the toy when he grabs it out.

"You want?" Adam asks, offering it to him, and shakes his head.

"I want you to." He might be turning bright red, he can feel the heat gathering behind his ears, but Adam smiles at him, a little dark and a lot proud, and he'd do a lot more for that look.

He undresses before Adam can prompt him, drops his shirt onto his pants in a pile and toes off his socks. Adam always thinks it's cute, how he wears something on his feet all the time, but Kris can't help it if his toes get cold. He's not worried about that now, though, so he sits on the edge of the bed and asks, "Can you actually undress, this time? It's becoming a theme, this fucking fully-clothed thing."

"Yeah," Adam laughs, "I didn't plan on anything else," and yeah, he's naked by the time he gets to Kris. "Do you want to be on your stomach?"

Kris stops to think about it. It's a toss up, letting see his face versus knowing he'll stare at his ass the whole time, and Kris can't choose so he thinks _variety is the spice of life_ and says, "Um. I kind of," he stops, looks down at it and at the floor and forces out, "I kind of want to lean over the edge. Of the bed."

Adam's surprised for once and Kris half-smiles at him, can't believe he feels nervous. Asking for it isn't any different than just agreeing to it.

Except for how it is.

Kris turns over, feels incredibly awkward as he scrabbles onto his elbows and finds the floor with his feet. He gets settled, and shit it's more open than he'd thought it would be, his ass in the air and he's cold, the fan's on too high.

Adam smoothes a hand down his back, asks, "Ready?" and Kris wants to say no.

"Yeah."

"Alright," Adam tells him, and presses against his hip to hold him still. He slides a couple of fingers in, pressing lube into him and opening him just enough that he can take the vibrator in one slow thrust. "Can you take it all the way this time?"

And maybe he'll be wrong, but he takes a deep breath and says, "Yeah," because at least he intends to try. He thinks Adam will help him.

Kris makes a noise when it starts inside him, but he closes his eyes and forces himself to relax as Adam fucks him with it gently. He'd forgotten; it's only been a few weeks, but fuck. Adam slides a thumb around his rim, presses into him between the vibe and skin, and Kris sucks in a breath. "Going up," Adam warns, and Kris hears the click barely a second before it increases.

He's so hard already, and he squirms, pushes himself against the bed and can't get enough friction, it's a crap position for that, so he slides a hand down to his cock. Adam grabs his wrist, "No," clicks it up to three, barely a moment in between, and says, "You'll get there soon." And yeah, he will, but that's not the point. He rubs against the bed again and Adam grabs his hip, pulls him away. "We can always put you on all fours," Adam tells him warningly, and Kris groans at him but stays still. He's limp on the bed now, he doesn't think he'd be able to keep himself up.

Then Adam turns it to four and he can't even keep his legs under him. He says, "Oh, oh," and Adam says, "Shift up," and he does, until he's sort of dangling half-awkwardly over the side but he doesn't care, he grabs for the sheet and moans, loud, and he's still trying to stop panting when Adam pushes five.

He loses it then for a minute, squeezes his eyes shut and fucking keens, and Adam just presses a kiss to his lower back and twists it inside, like Kris needs any more stimulation. He says, "Adam, Adam," desperately, and, "Stop, shit, slow down, I can't, Adam." He maybe says something else, but he turns his head into his arm and bites down, until Adam grips the back of his skull and turns his head.

"You can, Kris, it's alright," and just like that he comes, tangling his fingers in the comforter. It's no good, though, because he clenches down around the vibrator when he does, his whole body too tight for too long, and it's already too much. Adam says, "That's right, get it out," like that makes any sense at all, and Kris wants to say as much but his tongue's already too big for his mouth, he can't even breathe.

Then Adam turns it up to six and while Kris thinks, three more, three more, it doesn't matter because he isn't breathing, just sort of hitching in half-breaths and holding them until his vision swims. " _Kris_ ," Adam says, slaps the back of his thigh, and Kris lets exhales on a moan. "Stop it," Adam tells him, "You're fine," and no, he isn't, can't he see, Adam's not even moving it, it's just all the way in him and pressing hard, moving inside him and he can't come again but he needs.

He whines, low in his throat, and twitches a little, but beyond that he's just still, can't stop himself from clenching around the toy and jerking with it. Then Adam slides a whole finger in next to it and he almost makes it off the bed, he shakes so hard. "Kris," Adam says again, and Kris hates him so much, he sounds like he's almost laughing when Kris can't even keep his eyes open.

He slides his tongue along Kris' thigh, up towards his ass, and _oh_ , he's not laughing, he's moaning, he sounds like he's about to come too and he hasn't even been touched, and Kris writhes against the bed again, he can't help it.

"Already?" Adam asks, trailing a hand to his cock, and he's hard again, he can't help it, but he says, "Please, no, no," when Adam grabs him because there's three more, _three_ more, and he doesn't think he can take them if he comes again, he's already drawn so tight.

"Okay, hush," he's told, and then Adam pushes it up to seven. He doesn't even make a sound, just squeezes his eyes shut as tight as he can and feels his arms cramp up, he's gripping the bedclothes so hard. He can hear Adam behind him, breathing hard and jerking himself off, skin making slick soft sounds, and he focuses on that, listens to his soft murmurs and how his hand feels when he presses against Kris' hip, sticky with lube and precome.

Adam slides the vibrator out to just the tip and Kris squirms, wants to beg for him not to tease him, not to fuck him, he can do it like he told Adam he would but not if he pushes like that, pushes too hard. But Adam doesn't; he pushes it up to eight, and Christ, Kris doesn't even know how long he's waiting before moving it up each speed but it's too long and not enough time. Then he starts to slide it in and he pushes a finger in with it, pressing in just along the edge so Kris feels himself stretch open just a little further and he squirms, but it's still nothing compared to the vibrator. Then he presses in a second finger and Kris can't focus on anything but him, his fingers and his other hand where it's pressing the vibrator as far in as it can go, not as far as Kris can take but it's too small, Kris could take bigger.

He will, he thinks, and Adam twists his fingers. It _hurts_ , is the thing, like a sudden sharp slap when you're not expecting it, but the rate he's going, he's willing to bet he'd like that, too. He presses back, as much as he can, and Adam moves his fingers again, slides them in and all the way out, presses them in so he opens and twists and the fucking vibrator doesn't move the whole time, just presses in hard and merciless and he's going to come again, he can't – "Adam, I," is as far as he gets, and then he is coming.

He can't even cry out because Adam takes his fingers away and the vibrator's all the way up and he doesn't even know what he's doing, moving closer or away and he's all stretched out so it should be easier but it's not, it's _not_ , and he can't even say Adam's _name_.

There are his hands, petting up and down his back and sides and ass like he's helping Kris, telling him he knows, he's good, so beautiful, and Kris wants to scream because it shouldn't mean anything but it's enough to make Kris stay pliant and quiet while every nerve in his body screams. Then Adam's coming, he feels some of it land on the back of his leg, and he didn't even hear him jerking off, didn't feel his weight shifting against the bed as he got close. But he comes and Kris doesn't make a sound, curls still on the bed because he can't even uncurl his fingers, he just squirms and moans and waits for Adam to turn it off, let him loose.

When it is off, though, he still can't move, just hitches slightly when he breathes and lets Adam slide the vibrator out. He's open, the skin weirdly desensitized so when Adam presses a couple of fingers in he can feel them, feel them move and press, he manages to groan when Adam twists them against his prostate, but he can't feel texture and Adam licks along his fingers he feels warm and wet and not much else. He's thankful for it, he thinks, because Adam's horrible about rimming him, will lick into him for hours, and he's too tired to do more than twitch when he scissors his fingers and flicks his tongue between them.

Then Adam's done, and he pulls Kris all the way up on the bed, pulls the quilt from the foot up over them and spoons behind him, sliding his hand up and down Kris side. Finally Kris shakes himself, like, he didn't mean to do it but he shivers from his toes curling up to his neck curving forward, and Adam says, "Hi."

Kris repeats it back to him but his voice cracks and he clears his throat, voice rough. "Hi."

"Are you doing all right?" Adam sounds a little unsure which Kris thinks is probably the most endearing thing ever, and he turns around, presses closer.

"Yeah. Yeah," he says, and, "Nap time, though."

\---

5.

Kris should've known the vibrator thing wouldn't end there. He really hasn't played with it, can't bring himself to, because it's still in Adam's shoebox, which is so distinctly his when they don't keep most things private that Kris can't bring himself to open it, even to get something that he really thinks of as theirs.

He asks Adam about it once and Adam looks at him, doesn't answer, and Kris is left feeling like he disappointed him somehow, like he was supposed to know but he didn't.

So they don't play with the vibrator again, and after the one time Kris asked they practically didn't do anything, a couple of blowjobs and kisses each day until Kris shoved Adam down into a kitchen chair and straddled him, threatened to leave him if he didn't get fucked.

But the Thursday after that Adam comes to him and says, "I want you to take the vibe again," and Kris doesn't even stop to think before he says, "Yes." Except Adam wasn't done, and he finishes, "Yeah, but I also want to fuck you," and Kris makes a face like so? and Adam raises his eyebrows. "At the same time," pointedly, and Kris' whole body flushes warm.

His reaction's a little embarrassing, probably, because Adam can see it, smiles at him all pleased. Adam tilts his head towards their bedroom. "Now?" he asks, and pushes himself to his feet.

It's pretty easy, actually, all things considered. The toy's small enough, though Kris isn't clueless enough not to realize that they won't stop here. He knows for a fact that Adam already ordered a bigger toy; he'd made Kris come and look at all the ones he was considering, probably to see his reaction, but he wouldn't tell him which one he got. Kris doesn't know if it's already come in the mail, but if it had he wouldn't know – it's another one of Adam's things, and it's probably in his mysterious shoebox.

But Adam gives him three fingers, and then Kris gets nervous, because he waits for Adam to grab the toy but he doesn't. He pulls out, slicks up his hand a lot, but he isn't teasing too much because tonight this is just a means to an end. Then he's pushing in four fingers and Kris says, "Adam, this," because if the toy and his cock are going to be bigger than this it's not going to be easy.

"Settle," Adam tells him, watching his fingers, and then he twists his whole goddamn hand and Kris' eyes roll back in his head. There's lube all over his thighs, wet and a taunting reminder of when Adam started all of this, and he says, "I hate you," for posterity's sake.

Then Adam is pushing in the toy and Kris says, "Please don't," when he reaches for the controls, and Adam looks at him searchingly and Kris says, "Not until you're in, please, just," because he wants to get it over with, each minute is time for him to grow more nervous. The toy feels small, simple, not nearly worth the freaking out he'd done over it at first, and he almost laughs when he thinks that what they're trying next probably won't ever be simple.

But Adam pushes two more fingers in next to the toy and Kris can take them, four was bigger than this, but the third from Adam and he's trying to move away, unconsciously fighting as he pushes himself up on his elbows and squirms.

"This isn't working," Adam says, and Kris' stomach sinks, "Roll over."

He does, and yeah, that's easier, it's like a first time where you have to give up intimacy and just go for the easiest position, because this way Adam can hold him down, move his hips like he wants, and Kris isn't too proud to admit that it makes things just how they need, sometime. The three still burn, a feeling he's gotten used to being without, and he winces and squirms a little but Adam adds more lube, unusually patient, and turns the toy on to the lowest setting. He tells Kris before he can argue, "Just until you're open, then I'll turn it off," and Kris sighs and rocks back into it, because yeah, that's nice.

Adam turns the toy off and Kris has to fight not to tense up, because he knows what that means, then, but Adam pushes against him and the toy is right there, a weird contrast, and he can't force his body to open. Adam slides the tip of a finger in, stretches him open just a little bit, and he presses harder than he has to open Kris before but he slides in, just a little, and Kris' body freezes up, because god.

"You have got to relax," Adam reminds him, but his voice is tight, his fingers digging into Kris' hips nails and all, and Kris wants to ask him how he's supposed to relax when _Adam_ can't even do it. And then he realizes that this, at least, is something Adam's never done before, maybe the first thing they've just done with each other, and he shudders a little and Adam slides in a bit further.

Kris can't help, after that, but he says, "Adam," permission and plea, and he thrusts a little, enough to get going, and once he's moving it's no worse than when he'd just been still, so Kris whimpers at it and forces his hips back into it. He flinches when Adam presses at the edge of the toy, he's stretched so wide and touch there isn't extra stimulation, it's bright and painful and Kris isn't sure he'll be able to walk tomorrow, but oh, it's worth it.

"Hey," Adam says, and Kris moves his hips a little, feels them both shift inside, and Adam hisses fast. "Hey, I'm going to, now." He's holding the remote, and Kris squeezes his eyes shut, thinks _shit, shit_ , and tells Adam, "No promises I'm not going to come as soon as that's on."

"That's alright," Adam says, and Kris expects him to say it himself, because his eyes are completely blown and he's moving a little the entire time, like he doesn't have the ability to keep himself still anymore. But he says, "We'll just have to do it again."

Shaking, Kris doesn't have time to answer _yes, please_ or _no, not ever_ , before Adam presses the button and it's moving inside him. Adam, he thinks, gets the worst of it, because he jerks and bites Kris' shoulder and all Kris has to do is squirm, still trying to adjust. He's mostly joking when he asks, "What, just the first setting?" because it's still almost too much, he doesn't even know if he _can_ come he's strung so tight.

"Yeah, I think that's probably enough," Adam groans.

Kris opens his eyes, says, "Chicken," in an effort to distract himself, because Adam really isn't – Kris can feel them both, so tight, too tight, but it's only the lowest speed and he still wants to crawl out of his own skin. His voice gives him away, he knows, because Adam pets a hand down his face but he's not playing nice, of course not, not right now, because he says, "How do you think you'd feel with this vibrator on one of the upper speeds pressed tight all along your cock?" and Kris gasps and whines as soon as he's said it.

"Well," Adam shifts his hips a little and Kris is distracted, "We can try that next, okay? You'd probably like it," and Kris is going to have to tell him he can't do that, can't say things like that when Kris can't defend himself because – oh god, because he's too busy squeaking because he's being fucked by Adam and a vibrator.

And he is, he actually fucking yelps, because he tightens as much as he can, just to get even, and Adam squeezes his hips (even tighter, Kris has bruised before but he thinks this will be the worst) and just – fucks into him. He's actually thrusting, and if Kris had though about it beforehand he'd have guessed the vibe would move with him, so that Kris was getting both, but it doesn't. It stays pressed almost too far in and Adam just slides along next to it, so Kris can't ever get away from it and Adam's always been too good at getting him completely undone and he's – he can't come, just shakes and whines and Adam just keeps going, he's not loosening up enough to make it easy motion and it's harsh, even when he goes gently, and Kris cries out when Adam pulls one of his legs up, shifting the angle and his vision almost whites out.

Adam comes when Kris' body tightens again, shivering all the way down, and he turns the vibe off and he's still in Kris, but Kris is so hard, and he says, "Adam, Adam," over and over. He needs to come, so badly, but Adam slides out and brings the toy with him, and Kris' cock jerks like he's coming but he gets a weird echo effect, like it's the second time too soon, and he squeezes his eyes shut and waits to come down.

\---

6.

"Kris," Adam says, and Kris looks up. He's serious, like he has bad news.

Kris asks, "What's wrong?" and goes over to him, in case it's something really bad like someone's gotten hurt or died.

"You know what we've been doing, right?" is not the question he was expecting, and he bites back all the flippant answers about how _yeah, he was there, wasn't he?_ and what they've been doing that Adam's referring to, because he knows what Adam means.

"Yeah," Kris sighs, looks down at the ground, because he'd spent months trying to convince Adam he wasn't kinky, wasn't into any of his BDSM or fetish stuff, but he is, and it looks like he might be into hardcore, too, so there goes that chance at being right. It's not the worst regret to have about yourself, though, he thinks, it's just underestimating how much you'd let your boyfriend do to you, and not something horrible like being a sociopath or something, so he looks up at Adam and smiles ruefully. "Yeah."

Adam asks, "And you're okay with it?"

"Don't you think it's a little obvious?" Kris asks, because he sure as hell thought it was, but he feels a little lost again because Adam's shaking his head.

"We can't just keep doing this. It's going to get dangerous if we do," Adam tells him, and Kris says, "I have no clue what you're talking about."

"I know," Adam says, and he's using that same weird tone as when Kris asked about the box.

"Look, you're going to have to explain things to me." Adam has a look on his face like he's not too pleased with that option, so Kris says, "Or we go on like we have been," which is really what Kris is all for. He's okay with learning as he goes, and yeah, they'll probably screw up.

Adam tells him, "I've never gone this far with someone else," and Kris knows he's not talking about the sex.

"Me, neither," he shrugs, smiles, picks up his guitar. "We'll figure it out."

Adam still looks dubious, so Kris says, "You know, crossing bridges and all that?" and Adam responds, "How about I'll do the worrying, then, and leave you to it?" because Kris knows he's totally ruining his anxiety with how calm he is, and Adam likes a little drama, so Kris waves him out of the room and props his feet up on the couch.


End file.
